


An Unknown Number Owns My Heart

by shamelesslyromantic



Category: Miraculous Ladybug
Genre: Background DJWifi, F/M, IDENTITY SHENANIGANS, Ladynoir July, Ladynoir July 2020, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, more puns to come i promise, texting fic, they're being set up but neither of them knows it shhh
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-07-20
Updated: 2020-07-20
Packaged: 2021-03-05 03:00:49
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,451
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25397317
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/shamelesslyromantic/pseuds/shamelesslyromantic
Summary: A conversation that started with a dare quickly becomes the kind of friendship that neither Adrien nor Marinette ever expected to find, and ESPECIALLY not with someone who doesn't even know their name!Texting fic for LadyNoir July 2020
Relationships: Adrien Agreste | Chat Noir/Marinette Dupain-Cheng | Ladybug
Comments: 2
Kudos: 25





	An Unknown Number Owns My Heart

**Author's Note:**

> I've been wanting to write for a theme month for almost two years now, so let's see how this goes! (Who knows, maybe next month I'll finally publish that unfinished Ladrien June thing O.o)
> 
> no beta we die like sleep-deprived fanfic authors

**07 12 12 32 26 (ADRIEN) (23h13, July 1st - Wednesday)**

Hello! My friends refuse to believe that I can be antagonistic, and have dared me to do that thing where I text a random number and pick a fight, and since I’m just a little bit tipsy, I agreed. Are you game?

**06 13 32 35 22 (MARINETTE) (23h34)**

oh HELL yes i’m in i’m tipsy and full of rage let’s go

i’ll start

What kind of weak-ass opening was that? You don’t start a fight by being polite! Who raised you? Some kind of hippie?

_ Messenger group chat between Adrien, Nino, Chloe _

**Adrien**

Guys guys guys they replied! And said yes!

Let the games begin…..

MUAHAHAHAHA

**Chloe**

ok zoomer

**Nino**

Chillax a bit dude, you're picking a fight, not asking them out

**Adrien**

Ignoring you both now

_ Text with unknown number _

**07 12 12 32 26 (23h38)**

Oh, he’d love to hear you say that. At least I’m capable of using punctuation and capitalization as they are meant to be used. Did you ever make it past elementary school?

**06 13 32 35 22 (23h39)**

I’m sure you will be pleased to know that I have even made it as far as uni, and that too with a scholarship. My texting habits are merely a product of me being busy and having evolved beyond the requirements of polite society, though I can still turn on the social niceties when necessary.

it’s better than sounding like an overeager twelve year old every time I send a message… how old r u anyway?

**07 12 12 32 26 (23h41)**

10 and a half, actually. My parents say I am very mature for my age

**06 13 32 35 22 (23h41)**

yeah that tracks

welp guess im gonna fight a kid today. Prepare to die, sucker.

**07 12 12 32 26 (23h43)**

Wait no i’m not twelve! 

I’m in uni too

I was trying to freak you out, but I guess that didn’t work. :(

**06 13 32 35 22 (23h45)**

(i know, dumbass)

**07 12 12 32 26 (23h45)**

Wait, what? How???

**06 13 32 35 22 (23h46)**

……. you’re drinking? pretty sure you wouldn’t be drinking and texting unsupervised in the middle of a lockdown if you haven’t even hit college yet.

and if you are, i need to have a serious word with your guardians because allowing you internet access is clearly hazardous to your health.

But I digress. Aren’t we supposed to be fighting?

**07 12 12 32 26 (23h48)**

Oh, right. heh heh whoops, I totally forgot about that. (Both parts).

Okay, umm since the insults have kinda died down, what is a strong opinion you hold? (excluding obvious ones, like pro-choice and BLM)

**06 13 32 35 22 (Mari) (23h49)**

lemon is the best fruit!

**07 12 12 32 26 (Adrien) (23h50)**

What?!? 

Wowowow, that’s a stupid thing to say, for a uni student. 

Mango is clearly superior!!!!

**06 13 32 35 22 (23h52)**

lies and salnder

*slander

while i would be willing to die on this hill, I will not because instead I’m gonna defeat you and stand victorious atop your bloody corpse

**07 12 12 32 26 (23h54)**

Bold words for one so incredibly wrong

Mango is sweet, shiny, juicy, delicious smelling, and one of the prettiest fruits in existence

**06 13 32 35 22 (23h55)**

lemon is the most versatile

nearly any dish imaginable is improved by adding lemon

Ever put mango in your hot tea? I DON’T THINK SO

**07 12 12 32 26 (23h57)**

Nobody eats plain lemon, though! you always have to do something to it to make it palatable, and that “something” usually involves adding sugar! Sugar is bad for you!

**06 13 32 35 22 (23h57)**

i eat lemons plain how dare you

lemons are also the best projectile in a food fight, too

small enough to soar relatively unnoticed, hard enough to actually cause damage

mangoes would just go splat

**07 12 12 32 26 (23h58)**

Okay first

Mangoes don’t go splat unless they’re wayyy overripe or have been peeled. The skin is too strong (unless they’re thrown with more force than a normal food-fighter could generate, and at that point I feel like they’d probably break a bone instead).

And second

Going splat is usually the desired outcome????? 

Food fights are about maximum mess and minimum damage, which a splat accomplishes perfectly.

Why else do you think rotten tomatoes would be such popular projectiles when people are in stocks???

Lemons would cause serious injury and IDK what kind of food fights you’re getting into, but I want no part of something that aggressive!

**06 13 32 35 22 (00h01)**

…...suddenly I understand why your friends think you’re a cinnamon roll

If that’s how tame your food fights are, you’d be annihilated in a snowball fight

**07 12 12 32 26 (00h03)**

See, now you’re just being mean

I’m making logical points, and all you’re doing is spouting ad hominem arguments clearly intended to distract me from the obvious truth: I’m winning this argument and you don’t have a leg to stand on

Oh, and for the record? I totally SLEIGH at snowball fights

**06 13 32 35 22 (00h05)**

alsdjflg how dare you

as if casting aspersions on my character wasn’t enough, you had to throw in a terrible pun too??? 

It wasn’t even a cool one. Unbelievable.

**07 12 12 32 26 (00h06)**

At first, I thought we might stand a chance at being friends, but your pun hatred has erected a wall between us that I’m not sure I want to take down

**07 12 12 32 26 (Adrien again) (00h07)**

WAIT WAS THAT A PUN

okay nvm we can be friends again

**06 13 32 35 22 (00h08)**

…………………….

do i have to

**07 12 12 32 26 (00h08)**

Honestly, I think you kinda do. You shouldn’t have punned back at me if you didn’t like me at least a little bit :)

**06 13 32 35 22 (00h09)**

listen I’m still not convinced you’re an adult

or even anyone over the age of twelve

**07 12 12 32 26 (00h10)**

I’m in my third year of university!

I have an apartment and everything! Well, actually my dad pays for it, but it's basically mine

**06 13 32 35 22 (00h10)**

^that right there is exactly why you seem like a child. Don’t share facts about your life with strangers on the internet!!

**07 12 12 32 26 (00h10)**

but you’re not a stranger?? We’ve been talking all night! 

And besides, nearly every uni student in the world has an apartment. It’s not like I told you which school I go to or something… you barely know anything about me

**06 13 32 35 22 (00h11)**

i mean

i know your number is from Paris. And that you're in uni, with a dad rich enough to pay for your apt for you. But that's about it.

UGH fine

someone needs to keep you out of trouble, since your friends are clearly shit for your self-preservation 

But i’m not telling you my real name and I don’t wanna know yours

**07 12 12 32 26 (00h12)**

Oooh fake names! This is gonna be fun!

I’m gonna go with….. Chat Noir 

**06 13 32 35 22 (00h12)**

lame

**07 12 12 32 26 (00h12)**

Ah, but this gives me so many punny oppurrtunities 😺

**06 13 32 35 22 (00h13)**

lamer

**07 12 12 32 26 (00h13)**

What’s wrong? Feline scared you can’t top that?

**06 13 32 35 22 (00h14)**

It’d be a piece of cake, but I’m too tipsy and don’t wanna bother. Just call me Ladybug, since we’re doing animals

**07 12 12 32 26 (00h14)**

Whatever you say, milady!!

Wait, what are your pronouns? (I’m a boy, btw)

**Ladybug (00h15)**

For the moment, she/her. When I get really drunk, I sometimes enter the avatar state and become an entity, but that’s a discussion for another day.

**07 12 12 32 26 (00h15)**

Avatar!! I love that movie!

**Ladybug (00h16)**

You have to be lying or I’m never speaking to you again.

I’m serious. I will block you if I must.

**07 12 12 32 26 (00h17)**

Dwai, I was kidding.

Valid stance to take, though. First opinion of yours I’ve agreed with all night.

**07 12 12 32 26 (00h20)**

Ladybug? You didn't block me, right?

**07 12 12 32 26 (00h25)**

good night, I guess……

Hope ur doign okay

**Ladybug (00h26)**

LB's phone has been confiscated so she doesn't say anything she regrets tomorrow. Good night!

**07 12 12 32 26 (00h27)**

Glad to hear she's okay! 

Does this mean I win the argument? :P

**Author's Note:**

> Constructive criticism appreciated!  
> If you point out a typo, however, you must pay a fee of one compliment per mistake. I don't make the rules.


End file.
